At the time of her interview, Dede was a 48-year-old woman with paraplegia who had been through a tumultuous journey. Ever since she was two years old, Dede had been in and out of the foster care system, but after being abused by a minister working in the system, Dede chose to live on the streets instead of with foster families when she was about eight years old and stayed until she was roughly 25 years old. Her parents struggled with mental illness themselves, along with her siblings, who had also been put through the foster care system. Dede had been on medication for quite some time due to her schizophrenia, and constantly moving from place to place to stay safe certainly didn’t help her cope with her environment.  Listen to her struggles with medication while on the move here: 

Along with many of the other kids she had been living with, Dede was moving from city to city, state to state, always on the run. She was able to find a few moments in her life where shelter was accessible, albeit, unconventional. In high school, Dede slept in the school’s basement with a couple of other kids, under the supervision of the maintenance worker and occasionally her principal. In exchange for living in the basement, Dede said she and the other kids would help out with maintenance work. Her principal even helped her earn her GED and tutored her during her first year at college. Unfortunately, coursework was oftentimes very difficult, as Dede was struggling with dyslexia and aphasia. This forced her to repeat several different grades and transfer to a smaller university. During this time in college, Dede was able to find an apartment with a roommate. However, after some time of having problems paying for rent and medication, Dede found herself again unhoused.  

Dede said she typically chose medication over rent whenever she was in such a situation. If she went without medication for a little while, she would start having hallucinations and sometimes cause others physical harm.  

“From what I’ve learned, that is a reaction or a coping skill I was taught by my parents and a couple of foster parents. And I’d use that. I’ve even decked the minister that I know because I was going through a flashback. I’ve always told him, ‘Don’t touch me when I’m going through them’ because I look like I’m out in space. He touched me and I belted him. Busted his eye socket. I don’t remember the seven hours after that”.  

Dede says that was only one of the few times where she remembers when she’s harmed someone. The majority of what she knows comes from the flashbacks she occasionally has. Thankfully, she doesn’t get many flashbacks anymore due to finally finding the right dosage of medication. Dede had been on quite a few different medications, but she takes roughly forty pills every day and has been for six years. She takes four psychiatric medications, but the rest are vitamins – she isn’t able to take in many nutrients from food due to problems with stomach absorption. Dede deals with more medical difficulties than just stomach absorption issues. 

Listen to the daily troubles she faces here: 

When she was younger, Dede had a few jobs, from maintenance to working as a fry cook, but she truly enjoyed being a social worker. She earned the license after getting out of college but wasn’t able to pay for renewing her license, along with the accredited courses that social workers are required to take. Dede says she prefers working with younger kids instead of teenagers and hopes to one day become a social worker yet again. Her local Catholic Church offered to pay for her courses and wanted to hire her whenever she felt ready. Yet, there are a few issues standing in her way, like the daily seizures she has, typically three or four times a day. 

Listen to Dede describing the possible problems she may face here: 

Going through all that she faces can be a lot for Dede. She says her best coping skill revolves around animals, specifically her two cats: Mixie and Skittles (pictured above). The oldest lets Dede know when she is about to have a seizure by lying on her feet while the youngest will lie on her body. Dede used to have a dog, but he unfortunately passed away. She says she is trying to get a new one via a GoFundMe page and a yardsale, but fears she will have to use the money raised for other things, like necessities.  

Other than playing with her kittens, there isn’t much Dede can do without proper transportation because of her wheelchair. “I watch a lot of TV and Amazon. I catch up on the movies that way. And I do go to church every Sunday. I don’t go on Wednesday nights because I can’t get reliable transportation, and Access is getting more and more expensive, so I can’t really get out with it”. Dede says she takes it day by day because that’s all she can do. However, there are a few times when Dede says she needs to go outside, especially when trying to stock up on groceries. 

Listen to how Dede gets around, especially in a food desert: 

In addition to difficulties finding healthy food and groceries, Dede says the rest of her neighborhood isn’t very safe. She had been living in her current residence for roughly a year and her previous one for seven years. Dede has also observed an increase in crime in her current neighborhood. She wants to move and has been trying to for some time, but her wheelchair poses a problem – many apartments are not wheelchair accessible.  

Despite all the chaos occurring around her, Dede hasn’t been suffering from any hallucinations or delusions. She still gets night terrors and flashbacks, but the techniques and coping skills she has learned in her DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) sessions occasionally help. Dede has the most success with medication and music, but not for prolonged periods. To deal with symptoms she experienced earlier in life, Dede turned to drugs and alcohol. She started drinking at eight and eventually could only achieve a high if she drank a “22-pack of beer or a fifth of Jack Daniels mixed with white lightning”. Now, she says she has been sober for twenty years.  

Currently, Dede is living with her two cats, as mentioned previously, and has many activities she does weekly. When she can get proper transportation, Dede likes to go to the YMCA and partakes in water aquatic classes as well as water volleyball. She tries to attend counseling every Tuesday and DBT every Thursday. At home, she watches TV, plays with her Wii, and “torments” (as she playfully puts it) her cats. She likes to color, make jewelry, complete puzzles, and paint wooden items. Outside of her home, she likes to watch movies at a theater, go bowling, look at art galleries, and visit zoos.  

Along with possible social work in the future, Dede also likes to advocate for suicide prevention. Listen to her thoughts here: 

Most of all, Dede wants people to know that schizophrenia is merely a label. She says it is a very difficult thing to live with, yes, but not her identity.